From the moment I first thought about starting my own blog, I had the idea that I wanted to write this post, but you know what’s been holding me back? The fact it’s a bit exposing, honest, and maybe a little different to my usual style.
I like to keep things upbeat and positive, and my writing tone is pretty lighthearted. Now, i’m not saying you’re about to read a sad 50,000 word story, my aim is still to spread positivity, but I have been thinking a little deeper about the online world and that’s what i’m hoping to share.
I’ve had the title to this blog written for so long, but it wasn’t until recently I actually felt like I had the words to put down on paper.
The internet can be a fantastic place, a way to keep in contact, get inspiration, or even just a place look at funny videos of dogs with voiceovers.
But it can also have a darker side. And until recently, i’d never really experienced it for myself.
For me, i’ve always used my social media profiles as a way of keeping up with friends and family, and to share my experiences. Basically just me posting random life updates.
And that’s still very much the case.
However recently, I’ll admit I’ve been putting a conscious effort into how my Instagram looks, how active I am on Twitter (which still needs more work), and of course i’ve been sharing my blogs.
But it’s taken me a long time to feel ok about that, and it comes from the age old trap often holding us back. ‘What will people think?’
I know that my style has changed, and for people that have known me from before I started blogging, it might seem strange. Maybe even annoying, dare I say it … and that’s something that’s really been holding me back. The thought that my posts might make people cringe, or they might not really care about what I post.
Recently, I saw a pretty crappy comment about one of my Instagram posts.
The comment was about how much effort I put into my photos, saying I need to ‘get a grip on life’.
100% honesty here, it really upset me. The thought that someone would go out of their way to criticise something I was doing, what i’m passionate about, I just couldn’t understand.
And like any piece of criticism, it was a confidence knock. I ended up doubting everything I’ve been doing, and got myself seriously stuck in a pit of overthinking.
Luckily, I have some absolutely lovely people around me who were there to talk some sense into me, give me a big hug and remind me that it’s just one small, insignificant comment. I’m doing what I love, and i’m really enjoying seeing my blog grow and my Instagram develop,
I was so overwhelmed by the support I had from everyone, and it got me thinking about a quote I once heard:
"Be who you are and say what you feel, because those that mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind" Dr Seuss
Basically, the people who really matter in your life will support you until the end. No matter what you are doing, they will be there on the sidelines cheering you on. And that’s something I feel so grateful about.
On the flip side, unfortunately there are occasionally going to be people who want to shoot you down, it’s just a sad part of life. But the important thing to remember is that’s just a small percentage, who for some reason feel the need to spread negativity. If i’m being really blunt I think it’s a pretty shitty attitude to have, and I’ll never get my head around it but hey ho!
My top tips for dealing with this type of thing?
- BLOCK. If someone is bringing negativity to your life, or even just your Instagram feed, get rid. There are about 12,098,354 positive people in the world, which means you don’t need to keep anyone in your life that’s bringing you down. Out of sight, out of mind!
- PERSPECTIVE. When you’re faced with a negative comment online, it really helps to stop and just think about perspective. Think about all the positive things people say about your blog, or your Instagram, and just look at that ratio. It’s usually just one, small bit of negativity which really isn’t worth your time thinking about.
- DISCOVER. Go out and find someone new to follow, someone who brings nothing but sunshine and smiles to your life. There are plenty of them! I know for me, having positive energy around me keeps me motivated and inspired, and it really can drown out the Debby downers who may want to drag you down.
Moving forward, i’ve decided not to overthink things (a seemingly impossible task but i’ll give it my best shot). If someone thinks i’m putting too much effort in, or doesn’t care what i’m Tweeting, that’s up to them. I can rest assured knowing i’m full of passion and enthusiasm for what i’m doing.
In the same vein, and in an effort to truly drown out the negativity i’m making a conscious effort to show my support to everyone around me in any way I can, whether it’s a kind comment on Instagram or a share of a blog, I know first hand how important it can be to someone.
So send me links to your blogs, Instagrams, Twitter feeds, ANYTHING, and lets spread the love.