I felt strange this morning.
It’s a Saturday, and every evening this week i’ve had something on.
I volunteer at a youth drama group and this week it’s been show week. It’s super fun styling 70 kids with ridiculous quiffs and 60s themed hair, but it doesn’t half take it out of me.
Going straight from work to the show, and getting home past nine each night has pretty much exhausted me.
I know, soz grandma.
And to add to that, work has been really full on. I’m loving the way things are going at the moment, but it’s intense and there really hasn’t been a moment this week to stop and collect my thoughts.
So this morning when my boyfriend left the flat to go out for the day I felt really odd.
Now don’t get me wrong, sometimes I love my own company.
There’s nothing better than knowing you have a Friday night to yourself with absolutely no plans but to get yourself a nice glass of wine, cook some pasta, and stick a crime drama on. BLISS.
But this morning felt odd.
This week has been so busy and there’s barely been a moment i’ve been alone.
It felt almost as if I didn’t know what to do with myself. I had the immediate urge to try and make some last minute plans.
Bearing in mind I actually have to start getting ready in an hour to go back out, there isn’t even that much time for me to do anything.
But it felt like I just couldn’t switch off.
Should I clean the flat?
Should I go for a walk?
Should I reply to some emails?
The free time was almost scary to me.
I’ve been thinking a lot recently about being busy.
Sometimes I think being busy is glamourised. It’s almost as if it’s a competition to see who can have the most plans and the least spare time. I know especially in the working environment there can be a detrimental culture of constantly feeling the need to express how busy you are.
I don’t know whether this is something to do with keeping up appearances and ensuring that people are aware of your work load, but I personally think it’s seriously unhealthy.
Why should we have to prove how busy we are? Does that mean the people not talking about it aren’t busy? Or are they simply getting on with the tasks at hand?
I believe it’s the latter.
But it’s the same in our personal lives.
As I scroll through Instagram and read some of the captions at the end of the day or week, I notice how many people talk about how busy they’ve been.
It’s not necessarily a bad thing but I wonder whether we sometimes feel the need to always be seen as busy.
And i’m absolutely guilty of it myself. I love telling my followers what i’ve been up to and if i’ve had a lot on my plate, i’ll talk about it.
The problem I feel with always being busy is exactly what i’ve felt this morning.
If we’re constantly on the go how will we ever learn to switch off and fully relax?
Honestly, since starting my blog i’ve found it even harder to switch off.
As others of you who work full time i’m sure will know, when you get home after work there’s a constant struggle between wanting to do more of what you’re passionate about, working on your blog, or giving yourself time out.
At the weekends I promise myself I will do nothing, but I guarantee I can’t go a day without snapping something for Instagram.
I wonder as well whether this constant need to express our business is detrimental to others.
If influencers, bloggers, celebs, whoever it may be are constantly expressing how busy they are, how does that look to the younger generation?
Are you failing if you’re not busy? Are you uncool if you don’t run yourself into the ground?
What I think is really important is scheduling in time to relax. Even if it’s just one hour a day.
So that’s what i’ve done.
Tomorrow morning (Sunday) i’m going to get up early, clean the flat with Chris, and then spend the day in the ultimate chill out zone.
I’m talking binge watching a series, cooking some delicious dinner, lighting candles, having snacks, and plenty of cups of tea.
Just total relaxation.
What do you think about being busy? Do you find it hard to relax?
I’d love to hear how you switch off!